Fashion
by Ultimate Shipper
Summary: Naruto's taste in fashion has always been a bit off. SasuNaru AU ShikaNeji
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **Fashion

**Summary: **Naruto's taste in fashion always was a bit off.

**Chapter Rating: **M

**Author: **Merc with a Mouth

**Characters**: Sabaku no Gaara Haku Naruto Uzumaki

**Word Count: **2,949

**Genres: **romance humor

**Warnings: **Cross Dressing Sexual Humor

**A/N: **this story came to me after watching this genius video on YouTube, link is in the profile. I decided to post this because the only other story I have up is this angsty SasuNaru fic, and is was making me all emo. So enjoy I suppose.

Naruto's taste in fashion had never exactly been what most would call normal. It didn't start out that way of course his clothes were normal all through his primary school years, but then he started Junior High. In the sixth grade Naruto dressed up in a heinous orange jump suit, he saved for weeks just to get enough money to buy a sufficient amount to last the whole year. Then in the seventh grade he decided to dress up as a different Halloween themed monster every two weeks. When he was in the eighth grade he decided to dress up as a fox complete with orange fake ears and a fake tail, he even had his best friend Kiba tattoo three whiskers on either sides of his face. Now it was time for Naruto to start high school, and after careful consideration as to what his wardrobe would be, he decided that no matter what he wore to school his outfit had to at least consist of a skirt.

Sasuke Uchiha was about to start Konoha High a public school, this is something he's never done before but with a reputation like his no private school wanted him. It wasn't his fault of course, you see Sasuke always got what he wanted, he was exceptionally smart, and he was _the_ smexiiest guy to ever walk the face of the earth…at least that's what he and 9,500 screaming foaming at the mouth completely obsessed fan girls thought. It was because of this that Sasuke had a gigantic ego, which gave him, a rather…er…difficult personality. Some would say he was a bit assholeish others would say he was kind of a douche, but mostly he was just a dick.

"Hey Kiba" Naruto calls into the heinous bright orange object he calls a phone.

"Yeah" Kiba answers

"Your mom still picking me up for school this morning" Naruto asks shoving another spoon full of Lucky Charms in his mouth. This was his all time favorite cereal, they were magically delicious the talking leprechaun said so.

"Yeah, were leaving in like ten minutes" Kiba cringes slightly, he hates the sound of people chewing, Naruto knows this which is precisely why he chose to call Kiba while he was eating breakfast.

"Cool" Naruto says swallowing the food in his mouth.

Kiba is quiet for a long moment before "Why won't you just tell me" he yells into the phone

"No spoilers" Naruto admonishes laughing

"Dammit Naruto what the hell are you wearing I don't want to walk into school next to you if your dressed like a freak" Kiba screeches into the phone. Kiba has always hated the way Naruto dresses because a lot of the time people would stare at Naruto consequently Kiba to because they were best friends.

"Relax" Naruto says chuckling softly "what I'm wearing is perfectly normal" for girls.

"It better be" Kiba grumbles irritably, and Naruto grins "I got to go, my mom's leaving now. We'll be there in fifteen minutes"

Naruto jumps out of the chair he was once sitting on and brushes off his skirt. He grabs his bag from off the counter and takes a look at himself in the full length mirror on the wall near the front door. He's wearing a black skirt that's long enough to be considered socially acceptable (if he were a girl anyway) but still short enough to keep things interesting. He's also wearing a blue spaghetti strap shirt that showed of a strip of tan flesh depending on which way he bent, it had an angry strawberry on the front that was shaking its fist and yelling "Bow down to my superior awesomeness". He also wore black stiletto heals that most girls couldn't pull of; he'd spent a majority of his summer practicing how to walk in them. Then he flashes himself a bright grin slings his bag over his shoulder and bounces out the door to wait for Kiba.

Naruto wasn't just dressed this way for fun; he had a point to prove. His point was that just because he was gay and dressed up like a girl it didn't make him any less of man. That and wearing a skirt was oddly freeing for him, plus thongs were loads of fun to wear.

When Kiba and his mom show up in front of Naruto's house in there black BMW the windows are rolled down so that Naruto can hear his best friend let out a shrill horror filled girlish scream. Naruto grins at this Kiba's shock and dread is so strong it's almost palpable. "What the hell are you wearing man" Kiba screams "I thought you said you were going to wear normal clothes not a flipping skirt"

Naruto's grin widened "This is normal, people where skirts all the time" Naruto walks up to the car and waves at Kiba's mom.

"Girls where skirts Naruto! Girls" Kiba's voice is laced with panic, and Naruto has to fight hard to keep himself from laughing.

"Leave Naruto alone, he can were whatever he wants" Kiba's mom calls from the drivers seat coming to Naruto's aid, not that he needed it. The way Kiba's eyes were glued to his legs made Naruto think that just maybe his best friend wasn't nearly as disgusted as he'd like Naruto to think.

"But mom just look at him" Kiba cried angrily flailing his arms around.

Kiba's mom let's out a disgruntled sigh before leaning forward to take a closer look at Naruto, she gasps in surprise. "Oh my gods Naruto! Where did you get those shoes" she yelled excitedly. Naruto laughs at this he thought that she might like them.

"Mom, don't encourage him" Kiba whines, but they both ignore him.

"I got them at the mall for thirty bucks" Naruto informs her, his smile so wide he thought his face might actually brake. He was having so much fun it was his first day of high school Kiba's mom was stroking his deprived ego and he felt damn pretty.

"Liar" she cried "We are going shopping right now" she cried excitedly as Naruto got into the car.

Naruto could no longer hold in his laughter and found himself in hysterics this was just too much fun. "I can't miss my first day in high school" Naruto manages to squeeze out between his own laughter and gasps for breath.

Naruto cheeks are red and his blue eyes are sparkling with mirth filled tears and damn it all to hell Kiba had to stop himself from getting a hard on. It was almost impossible to be straight if you got a hard on by your best friend who was a guy. Kiba was straight he liked girls; he wanted a girlfriend he was not gay. It wasn't his fault Naruto looked so good in that skirt. It was a good thing Kiba had known Naruto for so long, because he could just always remember how stupid Naruto actually was, and that helped him remember why he only likes Naruto as a friend in the first place.

The ride to there new school was relatively quiet, seeing how Kiba was supremely pissed off that Naruto was dressed as a girl and in his back seat. But by the time they get to school Kiba has pretty much already gotten over it and even walks next to Naruto who's smiling brightly and excitedly talking to Kiba. They meat up with Shikamaru who is half asleep leaning against a bulletin board.

"So troublesome" he muses giving Naruto a once over "Why can't guys just where pants" he yawned softly and Naruto rolls his eyes before looking down the bulletin board for he and Kiba's homeroom. Two minutes later Naruto finds himself happily bouncing up and down at the prospect of having both Kiba and Shikamaru his two best friends in the same homeroom as him. Naruto grabs both of them by there sleeves and pulls them toward there first class excitedly chattering away and earning a lot of wierded out stares.

Walking into the class is almost like walking into a time machine; his entire class is almost exactly the same as most of his Junior High classes, there were only a handful of new people. Naruto could see Ino and Sakura excitedly chattering like caffeinated squirrels about God knows what. Chouji was munching on potato chips near a sleeping Shikamaru, who managed to move surprisingly fast towards an empty chair. Hinata was nervously holding up a nearly one sided conversation with Shino who still wore the same sun glasses, Naruto had never seen him without them. Naruto sits in an empty seat and Kiba sits in the one next to him and almost instantly all eyes are on him.

"Umm Naruto what are you wearing" Sakura snorted in disbelief and disgust.

"Oh Sakura don't be jealous just because those scrawny chicken legs of yours couldn't pull of this skirt." Naruto says smirking in a patronizing tone.

"What" Sakura screeches outraged

"There's no way in hell Sakura would ever be jealous over that rag you call a skirt" Ino cried coming to her friends defense

"That's right I forgot how jealous you both are because my chest is already more developed then yours ever will be" Naruto sneered smirking when the entire class erupts in laughter.

"Don't think you can get smart with us because you have really cute shoes" Sakura snaps angrily "What they're cute" she adds when she sees Ino glowering angrily as her.

Naruto doesn't get to say anything else because the class suddenly grows eerily quiet when a dark haired boy walks in. He wordlessly takes a seat on the other side of the room, and the entire class is watching him with rapt attention. 'Who's that' Naruto mouths to Kiba, to which his best friend shrugs his shoulders and mouths back 'I dunno'.

"That's Sasuke Uchiha" Sakura said in a breathy voice

"Really" Ino cried almost instantly all the girls in the classroom had hearts in there eyes and drool running down the sides of their mouths.

"Yes, I'd no him anywhere" Sakura cried and all of the girls in the classroom excluding Hinata were casting Sasuke a gaze that clearly cried out NOTICE ME in giant red letters. "Hi my names Sakura" Sakura said shakily. Translation: Desperate, desperate, I am really desperate. Naruto snickered lightly at this. Sasuke cast a disinterested look towards Sakura when something caught his eye.

"Oh god Ino he looked at me, I think I'm going to faint." Sakura cried.

"What are you blind bitch he was looking at me" Ino yelled angrily

"No way, it was me" piped another girl, and instantly all the girls in the class were fighting over whom Sasuke had looked at.

But they were all wrong that's not at all what caught Sasuke's attention. Tanned legs blond hair blue eyes short skirt, maybe public school wasn't nearly as bad as Sasuke thought it was.

Naruto was blissfully ignorant as to what was going on around him; instead he was in a heated argument with Kiba about whose tattoo was stupider. "Fox whiskers are too cool, you just got to stupid red triangles they don't even symbolize anything.

"How many times do I have to tell you, you flipping idiot they mean-" Kiba was cut off however when the classroom door slammed open and the teacher walked in.

He was a peculiar man with who wore a mask and had gravity defying silver hair. He just strolled into the classroom slowly as though he had all the time in the world and wasn't actually thirty minutes late for his own class. "My name is Kakashi Hatake I guess I'm your new teacher. For those of you who realize that I'm late good for you're less then impressive grasp o the obvious. For those of you who are annoyed by my being late get over it and get used to it. It's a big school I get lost." His voice is bored and listless he sounded like he would have rather been anywhere else but where he was now. "Now your all going to quietly copy down the rules on the board" he points to the white board behind him with a list labeled 'Classroom Rules'

Naruto scanned the list up on the board it was all pretty standard stuff; don't get up without asking, raise your hand if you want to talk etc. he sighed annoyed and slumped in his seat, he was expecting his first day of high school to be more exciting then copying down rules. Plus this stupid lazy Kakashi person wasn't even paying attention to the class he was just reading that stupid pervy book Naruto's Godfather wrote. Naruto knew it was pervy because well if you ever met Jiriaya then you'd know.

"Umm sensei" Sakura called across the classroom nervously. Kakashi didn't even look up from his book, but somehow she didn't realize that he was being quiet because he was ignoring her, no she took his silence as an affirmation to continue talking "Shouldn't you explain the rules to us" she asked tentatively.

"I said quiet what's your face"

"My name is Sakura"

"…Sakura"

"Yes"

"Shut the hell up"

"Teachers aren't allowed to curse" Sakura sniffs disdainfully

"They aren't" Kakashi asks in mock surprise

"No they aren't. The principle would never allow it." Sakura says drawing her shoulders up to seem bigger then she really was as though that would help her prove her point.

"Well Sakura, I don't really give a flying fuck" Kakashi said simply in a way that made it seem as though he were smiling under his mask. Sakura sputtered angrily her face turning an ugly blotchy red color but she didn't seem to have anything else to say. Naruto snickered quietly along with Kiba and a majority of the class, maybe this Kakashi guy wasn't as bad as he thought.

The next class Naruto went to he didn't have the luck of having his two best friends in his class with him; Shikamaru had advanced calculus, Kiba had French and Naruto had AP World History. Naruto nervously walked into the class, and found that unfortunately he was one of the very few freshmen in the class; the only other one that he recognized was that Sasuke guy from his first period class. The rest of the class was made up of older students. Older students that were all looking at Naruto, this made him nervous. And when Naruto got nervous he got clumsy.

"Shit" Naruto curses when his only pencil falls to the ground and rolls under the teacher's desk, (the teacher still had yet to arrive which was starting to make Naruto wonder). Naruto gets down on the floor and peers under the desk to get an idea as to where his pencil was, unconsciously giving a majority of the class quite a view. A majority of the male population leaned over in their seats to get a better view of Naruto, in their defense they were hormonal teenage boys, who the hell cared if it was a boy or a girl it looked damn good in the skirt and that's what mattered. "Great I just pushed it farther in" Naruto grumbles sarcastically as he leans forward to reach for the pencil, consequently so did most of the class.

This is precisely the seen Gaara walks in on when he steps foot into the classroom. There was Naruto on the floor on all fours giving the class an eyeful. He knew it was Naruto all right no one else had a pair of legs like that, Gaara would know them anywhere. Then Gaara catches sight of the entire class staring at Naruto, and he sends them all a murderous glare. Most of them backed off instantly, in fact they all did, all of them except one. Some kid in the back actually had the nerve to cast Gaara a 'What are you going to do about it' look, then goes back to stare at Naruto again.

But before Gaara gets the chance to do or say anything to this cocky bastard Naruto stands back up with a euphoric "Aha" triumphantly holding up his pencil. He grins blissfully for a few seconds, then catches sight of Gaara and immediately attacks the redhead. "Gaara" he cries excitedly jumping onto his friend and giving him an airtight bear hug, Gaara smirks inwardly as he knows he's the center of every guy's jealousy.

This however is short-lived because Gaara soon realizes that Naruto is hugging him, something he definitely does _not_ enjoy doing. "Get off me" he growls prying tan arms from around his neck.

Naruto pouted for about two and a half seconds "I thought I was going to be all alone in the class but then you showed up, you're my hero" and Gaara could see Naruto getting _that_ look in his eyes.

"Do not hug me again" Gaara warned

"I wasn't gonna" Naruto says ruefully

"You lie"

"Whatever"

"Why didn't you tell me you were going to Konoha?"

"I did six times"

Naruto gets a far away look in his eyes before an expression of dawning realization slowly envelops his features "Oh yeah" he says slowly "Well c'mon" he grabs a hold of Gaara's shirt and drags his friend over to a couple empty seats.

This is where Naruto begins to prattle on about nonsensical things that Gaara was listening to with rapt attention…okay maybe he was half listening to Naruto…alright fine he wasn't listening at all! Happy? Was it his fault Naruto never talked about important things? I think not.


	2. Chapter 2

Hello to everyone who has read my stories. I'm really sorry about the lack of updates, but something horrible happened. My mom found and read some of Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places, she was not amused. Now I'm stuck seeing a psychotherapist once a week, so yeah. Anyways I haven't had any access to a computer in a _long_ time, and was confined to my room. But now with school starting back up again my mom has to give put internet back in the house because I have some online classes as well as regular high school classes. So yeah I'm back and badder than ever. No I will not be discontinuing any of my stories. Now that I finally have my computer back I'm going to try to be as sneaky as possible and update as much as I can. I warn you though it will not be much. Sorry to those who thought this was an actual chapter update. I just thought that I had better let you guys in on what's going on and why I haven't been updating as much as I usually do.


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